monamidnight

Back To Black, Amy Winehouse

Everyone knows this one. But I still want to talk about it.

For a long time this album, and especially "You Know I'm No Good," was something of a personal anthem for me. My husband had decided he was sick of me, in his words, 'sharing my sexuality with everyone,' and demanded that I stopped publishing explicit stuff (I was writing a lot of fanfiction at the time).

And I gave in.

But I didn't like it. And I had always been upfront with him about what I was doing online. I'd told him I was trouble.

Of course, in the end, it was all for nothing. He left me for the dream of another woman, one with a different, better (?) sex drive, who had younger kids, who was thinner and pastier and deeply, entirely sincere. I never had a chance. (Did he sleep with her? I'll probably never know. It doesn't matter.)

But I'm glad I had Amy. She helped, actually. Her pride in her flaws, her seeming eagerness to burn the whole thing down; I felt strength in it. And she's still with me, now, even though she and my marriage are gone.

Thanks, Amy. I wish I could send you an email about it or something.

The one artist Mike and "Sam" agree on. As they should, she's amazing.

My book - really a short story, but an ebook nonetheless - is going through its final formatting. It should be for sale soon!

Enjoy some Cyndi Lauper while you wait.